About Being 22
My name is Amin. Somewhere 10 years ago I give myself another name. Kumprinx. Might sounded silly but then I embraced this name and let it represent the other side of me. For a while it was as I was living 2 different lives. Amin is the usual normal everyday people. While Kumprinx is smoking, curse swearing, torn jeans, and elusive, corrupt, nasty writer that is good for nothing. While Amin go fcuked all his exam results, Kumprinx is busy publishing his HC/Punk zine. While Amin is busy printing t-shirt, Kumprinx is also busy giving his blog a new facelift.
Somewhere a few years back, I discovered underground. I discovered HC/Punk. I learned that there is an alternative for this normal everyday world. I've discovered that this people think very differently concerning a particular subject. Knowledge is distributed at a whole new perspective. I only read zines. And never bother to listen to any of the punk music. Well maybe occasionally. I write zines because I have something to say. I need to voice out my opinion and to reach everybody in the community. Through my writings of course. But in the early years I was too stupid to think properly. I know a little something then blatantly write about it, without any proper research.
I always learned my lessons the hard way.
What you read here, and in the zines we're all Kumprinx work. And this sucker never goes out and meets people. Most of the time you'll meet the shy, non-talkative Amin. And most of the time, people got disappointed. Amin does not live up to the name Kumprinx.
A few years back, I take a giant leap in my life. I try to improve my way of living. I was greedy. I take the fast way instead of the right way. Victory was sweet but short lived. It takes the whole thing to start crumble in front of me for me to realize that it was a terrible mistake. By then it was too late.
Mistake. Yes I had a few. I never tell other people about my mistake. Because I believe to be successful we have to project a successful image. But I etched that note onto my heart and live with it my whole life. How much it hurt back then is equal to what I’m feeling right now. Anytime I recall the memories of my mistake as a crude reminder not to repeat it.
Deep inside we're all assholes. You know it but you just don’t want to admit it. I reject the thought that I am an asshole so much that I come to think that I’m someone else. Someone else that is victorious and triumphant. Then I hold true to that thought so much that eventually it comes to be. Holding true to something you really believe in is always my recipe for success.
But sometimes I think I know something but in actuality I don’t. I read a lot, did my research only on a particular subject that interest me. And I know that much, only enough to write and brag about it. Truth is, I know nothing! Then it come to me that no matter how much I read, watch, listen, knowledge is never enough.
Dreams. We all have dreams. Once I dreamed so high that it hurts so much when I failed. People say the higher you go the harder you fall. Not the case for me. For me, it's all about how you bounce back. Through the years I've learned my lessons;
I’ve learned to look thoroughly into people before giving any assumption about them
to contain my rage and anger
to utilize brute force and tenderness in equal measure
to admit my mistake and to ask for forgiveness
to be straight forward and to blast away sarcastism
to accept failure and celebrate victory
to appreciate the simple things
to respect people's view and to stand true behind mine
to be humble and down to earth
not to push my luck
to know that I should stop writing when the whole narration started to turn into rubbish.
In this coming years, next year in particular. There will be another major shift in my live. This time I have to make it right. Otherwise it'll be too late and stuck with it my whole life. It is time to repent my 22 years worth of mistake. And as always I'm eager to find out what's next in store for me. For anything that is, BRING IT ON!!!